how do you describe a male organ in your country?

Subject: 環球小姐機智問答

Question: Ms America, how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：美國小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms America: Well, I can say that male organs in Americaare like gentlemen.
美國小姐：美國的男性器官像紳士。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms America: Because it stands every time it sees a woman......
美國小姐：因為只要一看到女士，他們就會起立......
(Applause!Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms Spain, how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：西班牙小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms Spain: Male organs in our country are like our very own Bullfight or
Toro(Bull)
西班牙小姐：西班牙的男性器官像鬥牛。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms Spain: Because it charges every time it sees an opening.
西班牙小姐：因為只要看到有洞就會出擊。
(Applause! Applause !)
(鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms Philippines, how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：菲律賓小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms Philippines: Well, I can say that male organs in our country are like
gossip or rumors.
菲律賓小姐：菲律賓的男性器官像流言。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms Philippines: Because it passes from mouth to mouth.
菲律賓小姐：因為它從一張嘴裡傳到另一張嘴裡。
(Applause!Applause! Standing Ovation! Applause! Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌，起立喝采，鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms Iran, how do you describe a male organ in your Country?
問：伊朗小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms Iran: Well, I can say that male organs in Iranare like thieves.
伊朗小姐：伊朗的男性器官像賊。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms I ran: Because they like to enter through the back door.
伊朗小姐：因為他們總愛走後門。
(Applause!Applause! Laughter! Laughter! Applause! Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌，大笑、大笑，鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms India, how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：印度小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms India: Well, I can say the male organs in Indiaare like labourers.
印度小姐：印度的男性器官像勞力。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms India: Because it works day and night......
印度小姐：因為日夜勞'做'。
(Applause!Applause! Applause! Applause! Applause! Applause! Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms Malaysia, how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：馬來西亞小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms Malaysia: Well, I can say that Male Organs in Malaysiaare like
Protoncar.
馬來西亞小姐：馬來西亞的男性器官像Proton 牌轎車(馬來西亞國產車)。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms Malaysia: Look tough but actually very soft.
馬來西亞小姐：看起來很硬(造型類似HONDA)其實很軟(一撞就變形)。
(Applause!Applause! Laughter! Laughter! Applause! Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌，大笑、大笑，鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms Singapore,how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：新加坡小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms Singapore: Well, I can say that male organ In Singapore is very Kiasu
(Afraid to lose).
新加坡小姐：新加坡的男性器官很怕輸。
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms Singapore: It always wants to rush in quick and leave 15 minutes before
the show is over.
新加坡小姐：總是衝進場，提前15分鐘出場。
(Applause! Applause! Applause! Applause! Applause! Applause!Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms China, how do you describe a male organ in your country?
問：中國小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms China: Well, I can say that Male Organs in Chinaare like Deng Siu Ping..
中國小姐：中國的男性器官像鄧小平.
Question: How can you say so?
問：為什麼呢？
Ms China: Short and hard working, but can work until 90.
中國小姐：短小精幹，但卻可以工作到九十歲。
(Applause!Applause! Laughter! Laughter! Applause! Applause!)
(鼓掌、鼓掌，大笑、大笑，鼓掌、鼓掌)



Question: Ms Taiwan, how do you describe a male organ in your country?

問：台灣小姐，請形容貴國男性的性器官。
Ms Taiwan: Well, I can say that Male Organs in Taiwan like Chen Shui
Bian.....

台灣小姐：台灣的男性器官像陳水扁....
Question: How can you say so?

問：為什麼呢？
台灣小姐：明明不行，還要硬拗、賴皮逞強。
(鼓掌、鼓掌，鼓掌、鼓掌、大笑、大笑，鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌、鼓掌)

Random Facts

chowai, update lor~

teko, update la~

ciko, fast update~

walaoweih, so long din update~

dey macha, update la~

oi, update leh~

KNNCB WHEN U WANNA UPDAATE, ISH~~~


well guys, sorry for keeping you guys waiting for so long =P





My friend sent me an email and I find it quite interesting. Feel alot like sharing with you guys, enjoy.

Do you know?

"stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

And "lollipop" is the longest word typed with your right hand.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious."

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon..


In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.


If the population of China walked past you, 8 abreast, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

The cruise liner, QE 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Now you know more than you did before!!

I Miss...

I MISS.....

MY FRIENDS

STEAMBOAT

KOREAN BBQ

ACTING STUPID

GOING SOMEWHERE

JAPANESE SATAY

ACTING CUTE

PLAY BOSSY

ICE-CREAM

GOING OVERSEAS

CAMWHORE

YET, OF ALL THAT I MISS

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I MISS HER MOST!!

The Good Food in Ipoh

I have to be honest with you guys that Ipoh is a food paradise for food lovers. Remember Anton Ego in the Ratatouille cartoon? I think even the food critic would agree with me.

I didn't get to take much pics during my trip to Ipoh but i managed to cover the story of Ipoh's Dim Sum and the all famous Ipoh White Coffee. =D WOOOOLALAAAA~~








































Sedap rite?? yum yumz!!

Logics That One Might Learn in Life

Logic 1
If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity


Logic 2
Everyone was born intelligent,
but education ruined them.


Logic 3
Practice makes perfect,
but nobody's perfect,
so why practice?


Logic 4
If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?


Logic 5
Money is not everything,
there is Mastercard and Visa.


Logic 6
One should love animals,
they are so tasty.


Logic 7
Behind every successful man,
there is a woman,
and behind every unsuccessful man,
there are two.


Logic 8
Every man should marry,
after all, happiness is not the only thing in life.


Logic 9
The wise never marry,
and when they marry they become otherwise.


Logic 10
Success is a relative term,
it brings so many relatives.


Logic 11
Never put off the work till tomorrow,
what you can put off, out off today


Logic 12
Your future depends on your dreams,
so go to your bed now


Logic 13
There should be a better way to start a day
than waking up every morning


Logic 14
God made relatives;
thank God we can choose our friends.


Logic 15
The more you learn, the more you know,
the more you know, the more you forget,
the more you forget, the less you know,
so, why learn?



So which is your favourite quote?

Mine is:

Why can't drink alcohol when Jesus can turn water to wine? =P

5 Minutes Management Lessons

I just can't help myself but to post this up, this is real good shit, for me at least. Hope you guys will learn something from it.


Lesson 1:

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.

The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour.

Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.'


After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.


The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?'

'It was Bob the next door neighbour,' she replies.

'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'



Moral of the story:

If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.



Lesson 2:


A priest offered a Nun a lift.

She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.

The priest nearly had an accident.

After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.

The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'

The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'

The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.'

Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.

On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.'

Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.



Lesson 3:

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.

They rub it and a Genie comes out.
The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'
'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'
Puff! She's gone.

'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.'

Puff! He's gone.

'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager.
The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'


Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 4


An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.

A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?'
The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.




Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull.

'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.'
'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients.'

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough str ength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.


Moral of the story:
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there..



Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.

The dung was actually thawing him out!

He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.

Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.


Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your
friend.

(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep
your mouth shut!


THUS ENDS THE FIVE MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE

I DON'T WANNA CLOSE MY EYES

Remember the chorus part for Aero Smith's 'I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing'?

Yeah, that's right, it goes like this,

I DON'T WANNA CLOSE MY EYES

I DON'T WANNA FALL ALSEEP

'CAUSE I DON'T WANNA FAIL YOU, BABE

AND I DON'T WANNA TAKE SUPPLEMENTARY

'CAUSE EVEN WHEN I DREAM OF YOU

THE WORST GODZILLA IS SWEETER THAN YOU

I'D WANNA FISH STUDY YOU

AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THING


lolz, it's quite obvious that it's impossible for me to finish all the syllabus in 1 day lor

I recalled the day when Madam Martin Flora and Fauna asked us to take 1 hour a day to do exercises on her criminal law past years and stuffs, made me wanna laugh sial

I regretted watching ratatouille, I regretted having my whole 2 full hours nap, I regret playing with stupid games with my sis's new phone, I regret waking up at noon....

Omg, banyak to regret, but takdak masa to stardee, like that die lor?

ok la, tonite, DON'T WANNA CLOSE MY EYES liao, die die must try to finish.

wish me luck peepz!